How to Relate
What makes relationships work?
What makes them great?
What makes them challenging?
How can we do them better?
Relationships are the cornerstone of a fulfilling life. Connection roots deeply in our DNA, hence John Bowbly's attachment theory. If science and stories tell us that relationships qualify as the primary source of survival and thriving, how do we do them better?
The Darkside. We know the problematic societal sources. Social media cesspools, fear-leveraging news, and content overload have begun substituting quality relationships with a junk-food version, leaving us never truly nourished and satisfied. The macro culture influences the microcosm of our relational well-being. You might see couples in pervasive conflict, strained friendships tearing apart friend groups, cut-off family relationships, and toxic work culture environments, not to mention politics (enough said there). Whether you've experienced conflicts personally or viewed them as a bystander, you know what it's like to feel relational strain.
Shedding Light. Like Spiderman's Uncle Ben said, "With great power comes great responsibility," and we have the power and responsibility to live relationally. Responsibility creates possibilities. Building resiliency in the everlong relationship we have with ourselves builds stronger interpersonal relationships. When we think of goals in the new year, we often think of work, finances, fitness, and other quantifiable metrics. What if we transferred a portion of energy from our personal lives into our relationships? I know many people who have intentions to meet new people, find love this year, start a family, or want to reconnect with old friends. What if we begin by living relationally?
How to Live Relationally. Living relationally means putting intentional effort into showing up for those around us.
It means actively showing the people in our lives they matter.
Begin by asking, "How can I be there for you?" while actively listening and reflecting on the person's response.
Attend the event that feels slightly uncomfortable because you show that person they matter.
Host an event with friends who haven't met, and be the connector of your inner circle.
Passion Project Announcement. You might be able to tell how passionate I am about this topic. I love having these conversations personally and professionally, so I decided to record them. I'm excited to introduce the How to Relate Podcast available now on Apple and Spotify. The first four episodes are out now:
Holiday Survival Guide: Boundaries
How to Date with Dr. Lori Husband
How to Make Friends and Be a Friend with Matthew Case
How to Let Go of Perfectionism with Andrea Beardsley-Glover
Here on out expect new episodes each Thursday! I'm incredibly grateful for the gift you give in time spent reading the newsletters. Giving the gift of your time and attention means a lot to me, and know that I'm wholeheartedly grateful for you.
